Archive for the ‘Opinion/Ask a Mexican!’ Category
December 24th, 2009
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Author: by Gustavo Arellano
Dear Mexican: Can you recommend a solid, accessible history of California and Arizona so I can learn what really happened when the United States gobbled up Aztlán? La Chica Confundida Dear Wabette: The holistic classic in this genre is Rodolfo Acuña’s Occupied America: A History of Chicanos, but it’s a bit pricey, a problem that the legendary profe has told the Mexican he is trying to rectify. For California, I recommend Leonard Pitts’ The Decline of the Californios: A Social…
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Dear Mexican: I’m an Asian female, and for some time now, I’ve been fascinated by Mexican culture. I find Mexican males to be very attractive. Their food, language and music are just amazing! How much of a chance do I have of dating a Mexican hombre if I’m Asian? Muchacha China Curiosa Dear Chinita: Dios mío, are you in luck! Mexican society loves their Asian women—it’s the job-stealing, vice-promoting men we can’t stand. The beautiful, colorful flowing dress Mexican women…
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by Gustavo Arellano
Dear Mexican: As a Chicano/Mexican, I have lost my faith in God. While they take pride in their country like everyone else, and like to make frequent jokes, Mexicans are generally very humble (poor) people. Isn’t God supposed to be on the side of the poor and humble? Why is it that Mexico always loses soccer matches to a generally rich and arrogant people (Americans) who don’t even care about the sport? Plus, we started the swine-flu epidemic that could…
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by Gustavo Arellano
Dear Mexican: I used to frequent a cantina in Chicago where half the bar patrons were Polack, the other half beaner. The Polacks would speak in their native tongue and either start or finish all of their sentences with the word kurwa. I understand this to mean “whore” in their language. On the other half of the bar, the beaners would utilize the word buey in all of their sentences. Sometimes, the beaners would become emotional and interpolate buey with…
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by Gustavo Arellano
Dear Mexican: I live in a little village in England in a house that’s 200 years old, just down the hill from a tiny church that’s so old, it was actually built before God said, “Let there be light,” thus proving that Stephen Hawking is a blowhard. The only industry around here, apart from digging potatoes and interfering with cows, is the cement factory, and that has been taken over by Mexicans. It used to be Rugby Cement, and now…
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by Gustavo Arellano
Dear Mexican: Why, oh why, do most Mexican women in the United States cut their long, black hair after reaching the pivotal age of 40? Not only do they cut it short; they then proceed to dye it all shades of the most unnatural hair color for Mexicans: red. My own madre is guilty of this offense! Why is this the case? Why do women in Mexico tend keep their long flowing hair and trencitas, while women here in the…
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by Gustavo Arellano
Dear Mexican: Why do beaners or gabachos deliberately try to ignore white people and act like they’re not there? Or when you’re walking by, why do the lady beaners laugh so hard with a repulsive fake laugh that makes you want to just punch them? Not only I have noticed this; a lot of other people say the same thing. Is it their secret way of saying, “Hey, notice me; I can have fun too!” It’s just plain, right-out rude,…
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by Gustavo Arellano
Dear Mexican: For most of my life, I was oblivious to the hate that Mexicans have for Salvadorans. I became aware of it when I made the huge mistake of marrying a Salvi. Once I became engaged to my Salvi girlfriend, or whenever I would tell any Mexican that I married a Salvi, I was bombarded with so much hate! I’d get responses like, “Eww, a Salvi,” or “Damn, I feel sorry for you—you married a salvi!” I’ve since divorced…
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by Gustavo Arellano
Dear Mexican: As teachers, we’ve been exhorted to expand our efforts in closing the achievement gap between majority and minority students (read: Anglos and Mexicans). I teach all of my students in the best ways that I can determine for each individual student, within the constraints of a classroom of 20 or more. In my 18 years, I have observed, on many occasions, Mexican girls choosing to fail their freshman year, in spite of obvious intelligence and interest in the…
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by Gustavo Arellano
Dear Mexican: An uninsured wetback just hit my car and totaled his. He had no insurance and no license, but he did have a nice cell phone. I asked him if he was OK in my limited Spanish, but he did not ask about me or my children. He was handcuffed and taken away to be booked for one hour so authorities could get his real name. This incident will cost me hundreds of dollars, even with my insurance. My…
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